Kristin Cavallari was 'blindsided' by Jay Cutler's divorce filing asking for primary custody of the kids which has 'damaged their amicable negotiations'
Kristin Cavallari was reportedly 'blindsided' by Jay Cutler's filing for divorce.
The 33-year-old reality star knew 'that their marriage has been over' for some time but was not expecting her estranged husband to lodge paperwork to legally end their union last week and the sudden move has damaged their 'amicable' negotiations.
'She had hoped they could work things out more amicably and they were off to a good start before Jay pulled the trigger,' a source tells E! News.
![In shock: Kristin Cavallari was reportedly 'blindsided' by Jay Cutler's filing for divorce, according to E! News](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798356-8269633-image-a-20_1588169569718.jpg)
In shock: Kristin Cavallari was reportedly 'blindsided' by Jay Cutler's filing for divorce, according to E! News
![Tough one: The 33-year-old reality star knew 'that their marriage has been over' for some time but wasn't expecting her estranged husband to lodge paperwork to legally end their union last week. Seen in October](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/28/21/27754854-8265593-Did_reality_TV_doom_them_People_s_source_claimed_that_Kristin_s_-a-6_1588104883661.jpg)
Tough one: The 33-year-old reality star knew 'that their marriage has been over' for some time but wasn't expecting her estranged husband to lodge paperwork to legally end their union last week. Seen in October
In Jay's filing, he stated he was the 'available at home parent and the primary caretaker of the parties' minor children', despite reportedly having previously agreed to equal care of their brood, Camden, seven, Jaxon, five, and Saylor, four, and so Kristen was further 'caught off guard'.
The source added: 'His filing was basically trying to take her out of the equation so she had to respond strongly. She's not going to be taken out of the equation when it comes to her children.'
Another source added: 'Jay was playing for the NFL a majority of their marriage, for him to call himself the primary caregiver just because he is retired and she is working is not accurate.'
![Not playing nice now? The sudden move has damaged their 'amicable' negotiations, it was claimed; seen in 2011](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798350-8269633-image-a-21_1588169610216.jpg)
Not playing nice now? The sudden move has damaged their 'amicable' negotiations, it was claimed; seen in 2011
![This is odd: Kristin and Jay seemed to be in OK spirits when they went on vacation this month](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798516-8269633-This_is_odd_When_on_her_last_trip_she_said_that_she_still_loved_-m-36_1588170444767.jpg)
This is odd: Kristin and Jay seemed to be in OK spirits when they went on vacation this month
The Very Cavallari star is now working to seek full custody of the children because she 'feels she can raise the kids in the safest environment.'
Prior to Jay's divorce petition, he and Kristin had been 'staying in the house three days on and three days off' so the kids could stay in their home but now the former couple are 'on edge' and both are living in 'separate parts' of their Nashville abode.
In her divorce filing, the Uncommon James owner accused the 36-year-old NFL player of 'inappropriate marital conduct', and also cited 'irreconcilable differences' as a reason for ending their seven-year marriage.
She alleged Jay is 'guilty of such inappropriate marital conduct as renders further cohabitation unsafe and improper'.
According to the documents, Kristin listed their date of separation as April 7, while in his own papers, Jay dated their split as April 21.
![Ouch: In Jay's filing, he stated he was the 'available at home parent and the primary caretaker of the parties' minor children', despite reportedly having previously agreed to equal care of their brood, Camden, seven, Jaxon, five, and Saylor, four, and so Kristen was further 'caught off guard'. Seen in 2012](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798354-8269633-image-a-22_1588169635760.jpg)
Ouch: In Jay's filing, he stated he was the 'available at home parent and the primary caretaker of the parties' minor children', despite reportedly having previously agreed to equal care of their brood, Camden, seven, Jaxon, five, and Saylor, four, and so Kristen was further 'caught off guard'. Seen in 2012
![Looking happy: Cavallari posted a very confident and inviting photo to her Uncommon James jewelry Instagram page on Monday; the image was taken earlier this year](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/28/15/27754848-8265593-image-m-2_1588085689566.jpg)
Looking happy: Cavallari posted a very confident and inviting photo to her Uncommon James jewelry Instagram page on Monday; the image was taken earlier this year
On Monday she announced the split on Instagram.
'With great sadness, after 10 years together we have come to a loving conclusion to get a divorce,' she stated.
'We have nothing but love and respect for one another and are deeply grateful for the years shared, memories made, and the children we are so proud of. This is just the situation of two people growing apart. We ask everyone to respect our privacy as we navigate this difficult time within our family.'
Insiders previously claimed the former couple had accused each other of infidelity and had an 'antagonistic' relationship.
![A burn: The source added: 'His filing was basically trying to take her out of the equation so she had to respond strongly. She's not going to be taken out of the equation when it comes to her children.' Seen in December](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798358-8269633-image-a-23_1588169666686.jpg)
A burn: The source added: 'His filing was basically trying to take her out of the equation so she had to respond strongly. She's not going to be taken out of the equation when it comes to her children.' Seen in December
A source told Us Weekly: 'The word around Nashville is they really just don't like each other anymore.
'They would accuse each other of cheating, but nothing really solid. They are both very stubborn and bump heads a lot and neither backs down.'
The source added: 'Kristin and Jay always seemed annoyed with each other and they were only on the same side when it came to their kids.
'Their personal relationship became antagonistic and it was better for their whole family to divorce.'
Just two days after filing for divorce, Cavallari took the word 'wife' off of her bio.
The entrepreneur, who was married to Cutler for seven years, now just has 'Momma' and 'Founder + CEO' of her companies Uncommon James and Little James clothing.
Cavallari added that she's a '2x @nytimes Bestselling Author,' adding that her newest cookbook True Comfort is out September.
The mother of three also listed @verycavallari, which is her and Jay's reality show on E!
Her date of separation, April 7, interestingly enough is the day she and Jay got back to Nashville after they were stuck in the Bahamas for three weeks, Us Weekly reported.
Cutler didn't note any 'misconduct' in his divorce filings and listed their separation date as April 21 with a request for joint custody of their children.
Cavallari wants primary physical custody of their three kids, child support, and for her estranged husband to pay for their health insurance.
She claimed that Cutler wasn't available as a father to their kids in her filing, which he denied in his filing.
![](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798526-8269633-image-m-26_1588169759294.jpg)
Hey, that's not Jay! Kristin spent time with a pal instead of her husband when in the Turks And Caicos recently. A source has said that the couple already knew they were divorcing when they were on the trip
She had in her papers: 'She denies that Husband has always been the available at home parent and primary caretaker of the parties' minor children. Wife would show that she had been the primary residential parent.'
She is also asking for Cutler to maintain a life insurance policy with her listed as the sole beneficiary.
Cutler said in his filing: 'Husband has always been the available at-home parent and the primary caretaker of the parties minor children.'
![](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2020/04/29/15/27798512-0-image-a-24_1588169738763.jpg)
Solo act: Often during her trip, Kristin was seen alone modeling swimsuits and her jewelry line
In March they went on holiday to the Bahamas with their three children, her hair stylist pal Justin Anderson and his fiance Austin 'Scoot' Rhodes.
They weren't able to fly back and ended up staying three weeks.
However, the duo already planned on splitting prior to their trip, according to People.
'On their recent trip, they already knew they were splitting up. Kristin and Jay had been having problems for a long time. They hadn't spent much time together in recent months,' their source revealed.
People's source claimed that Kristin's busy career and differing priorities led to their split: 'Kristin and Jay are a lot different. She has so much on her plate, with her brands and with her show, and Jay is not as interested in all of that.
'She's so passionate about her work and they couldn't relate to each other. So it pulled them apart.'
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April 30, 2020 at 05:25AM
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